Questions for the Editors

Question: Dear Editors, If Artifice Magazine was on a blind date with another literary mag, what questions would Artifice prepare ahead of time to keep conversation flowing? 

Answer: When you read something, do you hear the words aloud in your head? Do you play the guitar? Do you prefer rivers or oceans? Want to get dessert? What’s your favorite font? How do you take your coffee? Do you like badminton? Do you like squash? Do you like racquet ball? Do you like football? Do you like baseball? Do you like soccer? Do you like basketball? Do you like flowers? Please describe your relationship to your mother. Please define your relationship to your father. How many hours per day do you spend walking in circles? What’s your favorite type of cheese? What are your recurring dreams? Flying or invisibility? What is your favorite word, and why? Do you like us yet? Are we making you uncomfortable? Would you consider this a date? Can I taste your pasta? Can I taste your soda? Are we friends now? Do you want to be in our secret club? We made you this present out of string and sticks, do you like it? We made you this present out of bricks and dirt, do you like it? We made you this present out of blood and fingernails, do you like it? We made you this present out of our hearts and souls, do you like it? What’s your favorite color? What’s your favorite number? Do you have synesthesia? Do you have any tragedies in your history? Do you have any relatives you’re embarrassed of? Do you believe in true love? Do you believe in love at first sight? What’s your favorite movie? What’s your favorite book? Do you prefer mountains or deserts? Do you like chocolate or vanilla? Can we be BFFs? Can we kiss you? Can we read you like a book? Can we carry you in our pockets? Do you send birthday cards? What’s your sign? Do you want to go ride bikes? Do you want to go to the mall? Do you want to go to the library and make out in the stacks? Let’s have a party. Who should we invite? 

5 responses to “Questions for the Editors

  1. Check please.

  2. What’s a diorama?

  3. How come "can I taste your pasta?" sounds like a creepy pick-up line to me now?

  4. Can my comments be serious? I’ve never commented on a blog before. I really liked the flow of it! But, I thought my relationship to my was that she’s my mom. Is there more to it?:)

  5. Sara: Because it is a creepy pick-up line. Just not in this context.Jeremy: Thanks. And your relationship to your mom can be anything you’d like, really. We’re not here to judge you.

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